Just like the world is becoming more dynamic, so too are our relationships. All you need to do is scroll through Facebook for five minutes to see numerous links, ads, programs and quizzes in relation to compatibility, connections and exploring the self. No wonder so many are often confused with where to begin. I had to explore a number of above-mentioned resources to continue to better my connection within myself and with those around me. If anything my goal is to share something simple that I have learnt and perhaps this will be a start to bettering your connections this week.
Firstly, no relationship is perfect and we always need to continue to work together in all areas of our lives. Over the years I've learnt that your external world reflects your internal world and often we need to work harder on ourselves to better our relationships with others, so whilst I'm sharing today in relation to relationships, keep in mind that this can be applied to you first and foremost before doing this with another person.
By now you've probably realised that I'm the kind of person that takes a holistic approach to life so I'm going to share with you why my partner and I chose to connect spiritually and emotionally through floating and how we landed at this decision. How does that sound?
If you said no, I’m sharing anyway...
Every Monday morning my partner and I sit down and plan out the week ahead and no we weren't always this organised, it took nine months and a baby to make us realise that we needed to be on the same page. We both agreed that too many hiccups were happening in the home and with our communication for us to ignore that we needed to make time to plan.
Now my partner is full of energy and often won't sit for very long and won’t plan as often because it's already done in his mind, however I can't read his mind (hence the confusion). So as my logical self (Virgo) I like to write it down, map it out and literally be on the same page.
One of my favourite ways to do this is the Wheel of Life. There are many versions of this so feel free to change this around or google your favourite option but essentially it looks like this.
As a couple we rate each area of our relationship out of 10 and then set an intention for the week for each. I won't share all of them today but we found that our spiritual and romantic rating was a concern. This one kept popping up over a few months and whilst we made small efforts towards our relationship, amongst our business and family priorities, we had neglected to show intentional love in both of our love languages and it was now showing up in other areas of our life.
If you haven't read ‘The Five Love Languages’ by Gary Chapman I highly recommend for everyone, even all the singles out there as this might give you some insight as to why you're single ( I did this). So in-light of our low rating, we decided that this week we would have one dinner together (that is present and not a rush by- spoon in the mouth-running out the door eating-kind of dinner) and that we would hug longer, kiss longer and make time for some sheet rustling.
If you have read the book you can probably see that quality time and physical touch are strong love languages for both of us and to combine them we decided that a couples float would be perfect. The idea and intention was to connect spiritually by being in a meditative state together, connect romantically by spending an hour without baby in tow and whilst attending to our love we could even tick off our health goals by relaxing in 1000L of salt.
Whilst sheet rustling releases a number of endorphins the power of being another kind of nude side-by-side (or top to tail if that tickles your fancy), in a float pool, has incredibly powerful effects on our energies. To be honest I didn't think that this would be our perfect date night but there is something so comforting and sacred about floating in the dark with only the subtle touch of the water and the grip of your lovers hand. Science says that humans are made to physically connect with other beings beyond the simple reasons of procreating and this happens as early as in Utero. The desire we have to be connected is innate and evolving is critical to our species. This I am glad for as I’ve heard that some spiders eat their lovers after baby making!
Simply, we are not arachnids we are beings that thrive by connection. So how will you connect and work on your relationships this week? How will you commit to your energies and the energies of the one you love or the one you wish to attract?
Our experience led us to uncover another layer of our relationship that we can be grateful for. Often as parents our showers are quick and bath time involves swaps and running cold through the house so the baby can be warm first. Often an intention to snuggle up together for a meditation turns into a deep sleep and waking up to a hungry baby, often our tea goes cold and chatting becomes practical rather than pleasurable. Don't get me wrong we absolutely love being parents, it is one of our biggest and most precious achievements but to indulge in a Monsoon shower together, float side by side for an hour, feel connected and present then topping it off with a cuppa tea and a chat, need I say more?
Float for Love this week.
Happy healing Clare